Know Who You Are ENG
by Nokado
Summary: Isshin and Urahara know they can't hide the truth anymore. "Monster" came back. They can do nothing about this. The only thing they can do is wait. The two men don't know what "monster" wants. Or maybe they know but they don't want to say it out loud? Unfortunately, the first person to meet "him" is Ichigo. Is Ichigo the person "monster" wants most?
1. Chapter 1

Ichigo couldn't sleep again. He was wondering about this after he went back from Soul Society. Who was he?

Shinigami?

Human?

Hollow?

He sighed. He could do nothing about this. Zangetsu said that Byakuya took Rukia's powers, but he forgot about his own.

How did he get them?

He doubted that what his father said was true. His father was too stupid to be captain of the X's division. Suddenly he heard that someone was calling him. It was neither Yuzu nor Karin. But it was for sure a woman's voice.

Who could it belong to?

Ichigo got up and looked out of his window. Nobody was standing here.

It wasn't his imagination, right?

It was Sunday evening. If it was Hollow, somebody should take care of it. It was his job. He was "the one who protects", after all. He can't let any soul get hurt just because of his indecisiveness. He used his Substitute Shinigami Badge. He felt that Hollow was near. He stood for a moment trying to feel it. Suddenly he heard the same voice. He turned around and saw a woman. She was wearing a black coat.

"Hello, Ichigo."

"Who are you?" - Ichigo took the Zangetsu in his hands.

"You don't remember me, do you? Eh, yeah... Isshin and Urahara didn't want you to meet me. Just like you, I couldn't notice that I am a "monster"."

"Answer me!" - Ichigo felt that he should attack without warning, but he just couldn't. He felt "that". The same feeling he experienced when he was fighting with his Hollow.

"When you don't see your own mistakes you want go further, you know?"

 **"You said you're sick of all your fears, but you keep coming back around here"**

"I don't understand! What are you talking about?!" - Ichigo was starting to loose his temper.

 **"Perhaps it's time for you to be one of us now"**

 **"Maybe you've just lost your mind"**

 **"Kicking and screaming now you've lost your time"**

 **"We're voices in your head"**

 **"We're monsters of your bed"**

 **"There's no tomorrow for you, no matter what they say"**

" **Yo** **u know who you are."** \- The woman disappeared.

" **And we all know you're said and done."** \- Ichigo said.

In a second, he understood what has happened. He didn't know it, whatever it was. He just knew, deep in his mind he knew these words. He knew their sense, but he didn't understand it. He looked around, but the woman was gone.

"Ichigo?" - it was Chad. Ichigo was in a shock, he couldn't move.

How...?

"Kurosaki, everything's okay?" - Ishida lay his hand on his shoulder. - You're pale.

 **"You'll never be free."** \- this was everything Ichigo could say before he lost consciousness. Ishida reacted fast and grabbed him before he fell. Chad immediately helped Ishida.

"What happen?" - asked Chad.

"I don't have an idea... Let's take him to his father."

Ichigo woke up in his inner world. Or something that should be it. He saw himself sitting on a chair with his head down.

 **"It's been years since I** **saw** **a face around here. I was broken and alone in that hell I call my home."** \- said his other self. It wasn't his Hollow, he looked just like Ichigo. Slowly, Ichigo was approaching the figure, when suddenly it raised its head. Half of the face was only muscles, and the other half–.

Ichigo immediately raised from his bed. He felt sweat all over his body, he was breathing as if he was running, over and over again. He couldn't get rid of that face he had seen.

God, what was that?

"Kurosaki-kun?" - immediately he looked at Inoue with fear in his eyes which scared Orihime. She felt thrills all over her body.

"I... Inoue?" - he asked gasping for breath. He looked at his hands that were holding tight his quilt.

"Kurosaki-kun, please wait, I'll go for your dad." - Inoue went out of the room very fast and returned with Isshin.

"Ichigo, thanks God..."

"It's not mine..." - said Ichigo still looking at his hands.

"Ichigo?" - Isshin felt fear.

"It's not my hands, they aren't mine..." - he repeated louder. - "Take them away!" - he screamed and looked up at his father.

"Ichigo, what happen?" - Isshin grabbed Ichigo in his arms.

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" - Ichigo hauled off his hand which all of a sudden turned into clutches and he attacked Isshin's throat. Isshin tried to defend himself, but he failed and all he saw was blood all around him. Inoue screamed loudly and her scream brought over Ishida and Chad.

"What...?" - Ishida looked at this – Isshin lying on the floor, Inoue standing by a wall, Ichigo... Ichigo looking like an animal.

Monster.

One of his eyes was black, the other was still normal, brown. After a moment Ichigo licked his finger which was covered with blood. His face was emotionless, he didn't pay any attention was was happening around him.

"Looks like you need help, Kurosaki-san~." - Ichigo looked at a newcomer and growled.

"Urahara, what's happening?" - asked Ishida, but before someone said anything Urahara used Kidō.

 _"_ _Bakudō,_ _nr 30 –_ _Beak-Piercing Triple Beam."_

Ichigo screamed in anger. His other eye went black. The skin under his eyes was now black too, just like on his Hollow's mask. Ichigo blurted his right arm from Kidō, but he could do nothing else because Urahara knocked him unconscious.

"What? Was that...?" - Inoue was the first who spoke.

"Diane came back."

"Urahara, what are you talking about? She's locked in..."

"Looks like no more." - Urahara dropped Kidō and grabbed Ichigo's limp body. He leaned it against the wall and raised Ichigo's right hand. On the internal side of his forearm there was some visible writing:

 **"WE'RE BACK"**


	2. Chapter 2

This chapter was created somewhere around a year ago but I was too lazy to translate it, sorry for that [original story is at 7th chapter which was updated today, yeey]. It is probably different from my other stories [new year new me or something like that] but hopefully it's still good as they are [if they aren't then... well, can't do much].

Anyway...

Ladies and gentlemen:

Second chapter of 'Know Who You Are ENG' is here.

* * *

 **Bold text** \- **NateWantsToBattle - Salvaged** [visit his channel on YT, it's really cool]

* * *

The captains of the Gotei 13 were having a meeting when a 3. rank soldier from 12th Division ran to their room.

"I'm sorry for this but it's really important!"

"What can be more important than captains' meeting?" Zaraki asked with sarcasm in his voice.

"According to our machine, reiatsu of the Shinigami Representative, Kurosaki Ichigo, has changed!"

"Is it that important?" Sui Feng acknowledged it wasn't. How it could be so important for captains?

"Akon, faster." Kurotsuchi rushed him.

"Yes, Kurosaki's reiatsu has been changing before but now... This time it was like his soul was... dead. But after a moment it came back to normal. We thought it wasn't really important, he has a Hollow inside him after all...

"But what?" Captain of 12th Division felt curiosity.

"It was three days ago. Today, just a few seconds ago his badge has gone crazy! It was supposed to suck out his reiatsu when he was in his body but this time reiatsu started disappearing." Akon took some small machine from his pocket. "His badge started transcribing... 'that'."

" **It's been years since I've seen a face around here. I was broken and alone in that hell I called my home.** " Captains heard Ichigo's mangled voice. " **You always choose to stay, spend your nights keeping me away**." After a moment they could hear him laughing. " **You think you stand a chance to last against the ghosts of your past?** " A moment of silence, he started calmer. " **It's been years since I've seen a face around here. I was broken and alone in that hell I called my home. Should have left me to decay, finding me was your worst mistake and I've found my new obsession.**

 **NOW IT'S JUST YOU AND ME**!" He screamed in way more mangled voice than before, it wasn't his voice. " **YOU TURN AWAY?**

 **I'LL BE RIGHT BESIDE YOU!**

 **YOU CUT ME OFF?**

 **BUT I'LL ALWAYS HAVE ANOTHER WAY TO FIND YOU!**

 **MY BODY'S STILL MENDING, YOU'RE IN FOR A SIGHT! Another night? BUT IT DOESN'T GET EASY BECAUSE YOU'RE STUCK PICKING UP ALL THE PIECES THAT THEY SALVAGED!** " A sound of a chains was mixing with an echo of an insane voice. " **NO MATTER WHAT THE ENDING, YOU WON'T LAST THE NIGHT!** "

" **I hear you breathing in your room...** " Ichigo whispered. It was his normal voice.

" **Now don't you panic, it'll all be over soon.** " Said the other voice delicately.

" **And you can play your little games all day...** " Ichigo whispered again and then screamed. **"YOU'LL NEVER BE FREE!** " His unequal breathing could be hear everywhere in the room where was the meeting. He started talking calmly, everyone heard that hesitating in his voice. " **You block me out all you want.** " The voice said.

" **But I heard the sound.** "

" **The echo of a 'hello'.** "

 **I'll come back around.** " Ichigo finished and the recording stopped.

The captains looked at each other. Some of them were shocked, some of them curious and the rest were untouched. After a moment another recording started.

" **No happy ending...** "

" **Will ever find you.** "

" **All of these ghosts, they're**

 **from deep inside you.** " It was a quiet woman's voice.

* * *

Ichigo felt exhausted. He couldn't open his eyes. He didn't remember what happened a few hours ago, he remembered that he started panicking because of-.

What was that?

He didn't remember. He just didn't. He opened his eyelid somehow but still could see nothing. He saw only dark, darkness. It was night, he thought. He didn't feel his body, like his soul was between death and life. Was it the feeling when you're dying? No, it wasn't possible, he couldn't die. He was sure of that, more than anything else. It was getting harder to breathe but he ignored that. Maybe his body just didn't wake up yet but minutes has passed and his body wasn't reacting. He thought it was strange.

"Ichigo, are you here?" He heard a man's voice, he knew that voice.

"Dad...?" He said with a weak voice. He didn't know why it was weak so much.

"Calm down, Ichigo, go back to sleep, nothing happened." He pleaded. Ichigo didn't know why. Ichigo did know nothing. "Calm down, everything will be okay." Something happened that everything must be 'okay'? His dad always said that when something did happen. Ichigo tried to open his eyes again but he fell asleep again.

* * *

Urahara didn't want to but he had to inform Soul Society about that. Okay, he didn't have to, they knew. They knew something happened to Ichigo. They must be around his shop he thought. And he was right. After a few minutes he greeted Soul Reapers - captains, Byakuya, Toshiro and the others - Rukia, Renji and Ikkaku. Kenpachi sent him because he wanted someone to inform his when Ichigo would be fighting him as soon as possible.

"Kisuke, you know what happened, right?" Byakuya asked but didn't need the answer. Urahara hid his eyes by his hat.

"Well... Yes and no." He answered. "I know because I was with Ichigo when 'that' happened. I don't know because it was the first time I saw 'that' with my eyes."

"What do you mean, what happened to Ichigo?" Rukia asked.

"Kurosaki-san lost control but it wasn't because of his Hollow. If it was the Hollow, it would be way easier."

"We must talk to him."

"He's unconscious." The room fell into silence. Urahara sighed and finished. "Ichigo lost his consciousness earlier and when he woke up he started panicking. Isshin tried to help him but Ichigo lost control. I had to use Shitotsu Sansen so no one could be hurt but..."

"But what?" Renji asked.

"Ichigo lost control when he was in his body. It couldn't stand something like Kidō and lost of control. He stopped breathing. If Isshin didn't react like he did, Ichigo would be dead for now."

"You're hiding something, Kisuke." Byakuya said.

"Well... Soul Society probably would know-."

"About 'the monster I am", right?"


	3. Chapter 3

*Ichigo's perspective*

I slowly opened my eyes. I looked at the window, it was hidden behind the curtains but I saw the sun somehow. So it was around twelve or two o'clock. I slowly got up. I knew my body was in pain, why I didn't know. I decided to took painkillers, I didn't want that 'pain' to stop me. I walked down the stairs and opened the door where the clinic was. I knocked on a dad's office.

"Come in." I opened the door. Pain in the underside of my chest were becoming more and more troublesome. "Ichigo, you should rest.

"Can you give me some painkillers?" I asked him feeling tired. He went to the kitchen, I followed him. He took some medicines out of the locket and gave me them. I almost took a cup of the locket but then I couldn't bear the pain anymore. I just wanted to come back to bed, I don't know, something, so I went out of the kitchen. Suddenly before my eyes appeared some stars, I could see nothing and I hit the door, I think, don't know, I could see nothing.

"Ichigo, what's wrong?" I heard my father say, his voice was nervous, I tried to walk straight still, he grabbed my arm, I leaned on the wall when I felt my hand leaving the wall. "Shit, Yuzu, bring me an ice!" I heard him screaming when he touched my forehead. After a moment I felt someone, probably my dad, lay my legs on something, I don't know, high? That strange cold was unbearable, I groaned at the feeling. I was barely breathing.

"Oni-chan?" Yuzu asked when dad improved that cold thing.

"Yuzu." He started. "On the table in the kitchen is a box with medicines in it, bring it to me and something to eat, he can't eat it on an empty stomach." He laid his hand on my forehead and again that cold thing. After a moment I groaned louder and throw it away. I felt like my head was falling to the right, to the left, to the right, to the left. "Ichigo, please open your eyes." I lifted my eyelids, I didn't even notice when Yuzu came back. "Ichigo..." I groaned again when he lifted my head. "Ichigo." He repeated louder. "Please..." He said something more, I didn't hear. I ate whatever it was and took the medicine. "Ichigo, calm down, now I'll take you to bed, okay?" I don't know how but after a moment I was in my bed again. I was laying on the bed, in front of the window, my back facing my dad. At first I tried to survive until the medicines would start working. Dad was delicately stroking my hair, trying to ease the pain a little.

"Cold..." I groaned more than I said. I pointed my finger at the blanket, it was laying too far. He understood and hid my body under it. After a few minutes he asked how I was feeling and repeated it a few times. My answer was just a groaning. That pain was unbearable. "Can I go to the toilet?" I asked, even I heard the pain in my voice.

"Ichigo, wait, I don't want that to happen again." I was laying with that horrible pain an hour, maybe two, I don't know, I've lost counting. I didn't open my eyes but I couldn't fall asleep. "Ichigo, sat something." I groaned because of pain. Then I through about how I wanted to die more than anything. "Ech..." He sighed. The pain was slowly disappearing, really slowly. "Let's go, Ichigo." I slowly got up and he leaded me to the toilet. I sat there a few minutes and looked at my reflection in the mirror.

"Dad." I said hoping he heard me. My vision was disappearing, again I saw the darkness before my eys, the only thing I saw was my left eyes. The oppression of basin weakened, I knew I'd fall. At the last second dad dad grabbed me and I just closed my eyes didn't want to see it.

* * *

I was laying on the bed again but it wasn't mine. Dad's room was closer than mine was so it was probably because of it. I knew he watched me closely, I knew he was worried. I was too. He laid the blanket on my body but I knew I wouldn't fall asleep, I was too scared to, I through I would never wake up again. After a few minutes I was opening my eyes so I wouldn't and be sure I didn't die.

"Dad, where are you calling...?" I asked quietly. He looked at me but didn't answer. I closed my eyes and I think it was that moment I fell asleep.

*third person's perspective*

Isshin was horrified as a doctor and a father. His son never ever was sick and never again was like that. What happened? He didn't know. He grabbed the phone to call an ambulance when he heard a quiet whisper.

"Dad, where are you calling...?" He looked at Ichigo. His voice...

It wasn't his son voice.

Ichigo was pale, just like a wall. It was hard to look at him. He never fainted. Never. Never ever. No. He wouldn't call the ambulance, he deleted the emergency number. In hospital there were too many stupid people which could think wrongly. He sighed and looked at his son. He didn't even notice when he fell asleep. Ichigo probably didn't too. He smiled a little when he saw his pale face. Peaceful. But pale too.

"I didn't expected your call, Kurosaki."

"Sorry but it's not time for that, Ryūken."

"Did something happen?"

"Ech..." He sighed, he didn't even know what to say. "Ichigo... Something is wrong with him. In a matter of two hours, maybe one and a half he fainted twice."

"Ichigo? Your son?"

"Don't act stupid, Ryūken." Isshin said angry. He knew Ichigo would wake up at any moment or do something.

"I don't, it's strange, that's all. How it happened?" And Isshin told him. He didn't even notice his voice cracking. "I think you want me to see him, right?"

"Well... I believe it might be related to his reiatsu or... With something what happened before, Ryūken."

* * *

Urahara looked at Diane.

"I didn't thought we'd see each oters so soon, Diane."

"Well, I didn't too, Kisuke. Calm down, I don't want to fight with you or something, Soul Reapers." She looked at Gotei 13's soldiers. "I want to ask for a favour."

"A favour?" Byakuya asked holding his hand on his sword.

"Nothing too big..." She turned around and looked at them. "I just wanted you to visit Ichigo."

"Ichigo?" Urahara asked.

"You know, Soul Reapers Represenetive, after all..." She laughed. "No one likes to die alone."


	4. Chapter 4

**Enjoy! :B**

* * *

 **Answer for Black Bankai: Thanks a lot, I hope you'll like another one and another! :)**

Answer for Adelene900: Well, as you see I'm a little bit chaotic so... I don't know too. :D But it's going to be good story, I suppose. And the next chapter is going to be more chaotic so... Hope you'll like this one! :)

 **Bolded text is talk between sheep and wolf from League of Legends [Kindred]**

* * *

Isshin looked at Ichigo, he was slowly waking up, It was hard to look at it but he through it could get only better. He sat down on a bed, grabbed Ichigo's hand. The younger one opened his eyes and uneasily looked around. His father heard knocking on his door, it was probably Ryūken.

"Wait here and don't try to get up." He said to Ichigo who groaned quietly. "It took you longer that I through, Ryū-." He saw his ex-subordinate Toshiro, Byakuya and Ichigo's three friends: Rukia, Renji and Ikkaku. "Do I want to know what two captains are doing in my house?"

"We had... strange meeting. But we insist to see Ichigo, is he here?"

"Well... He is but... Never mind, come in." He took them inside then to Ichigo's room.

"Ichigo, what the-?" Ichigo rolled his eyes and laid him head on the right side.

"Leave me alone, Yumichika."

"Yumichika?" Ikkaku asked shocked.

"What am I talking about?" Ichigo grabbed his head in his hands and got up. "Sorry, I-." A moment of silence and Ichigo looked at him.

"Ichigo, what is wrong with you?"

"Who are you?" Ichigo asked unsure. They looked at each other. It wasn't possible he just forgot Ikkaku. Yes, he had trouble with remembering names but whole person?

"C'mon, I know you do remember me, Ichigo?"

"Who I remember, Ikkaku?" Ikkaku didn't know what was going on.

"Kurosaki." Toshiro said. "Do you remember fighting with Aizen?"

"But we fought with Yamamoto." Ichigo looked shocked. "Why would we fight with Aizen?"

"Who tried to kill me?"

"Of course Aizen and Gin, what is wrong with you guys?!" Ichigo looked at them all. "Who are you anyway?"

"Enough." Isshin said. "Ichigo, rest, okay?" He slowly nodded. Isshin walked to him and helped him to lay down. "If you want something, call me." He turned to the group of Soul Reapers and everyone left leaving Ichigo by his own.

* * *

It was... strange. Why were they so... shocked? I sighed. I laid my head on my pillow waiting for sleep to come but soon I was woken up by slight hug.

"Did something happen, Ichigo? I looked at Diane.

"I'd like to know it too..." I laid my head on her shoulder and closed my eyes. "It hurts..."

"Poor thing, is it your head again?" He petted my head, it was... Nice. My stressed out muscles calmed down a bit. We were sitting like that for a few minutes. "Poor thing..." She said after a moment. "You have such a beautiful eyes..." She turned around my head to herself. "Can I take one?"

* * *

"Ichigo... Is this really bad? I didn't know he-." Her talk was stopped by a scream. Everyone knew perfectly to who it belonged to.

"Why are you such in hurry?" Diane was holding something in her hand. People's blood bolted.

"You..."

"What are you talking about?" She laughed. "He still has another one, anyway..." She turned around for a moment. "His hollow will make him another one, right?" I can say he's becoming the Monster more and more... What do you think about this, MONSTER?!"

"Heh..." Ichigo was standing on the stairs with his head down. "It's been a while since our last meeting, Soul Reapers." They saw his face. Byakuya recognized him.

"Hollow."

"You're wrong." Diane said. She looked at him.

* * *

 **"There was once a pale man with dark hair who was very lonely..."**

 **"Why was him lonely?"**

 **"All things must meet this man, so they shunned him."**

 **"Did he chase them all?"**

 **"He took an axe, and split himself in two..."**

 **"So he would always have a friend...?**

* * *

" **...So he would always have a friend.** " Ichigo said while sleeping. Everyone looked at him.

"Well, it looks like someone's having a really interesting sleep." Ikkaku said. "Anyway, what are we going to do?"

"With Ichigo or...?"

"With everything."

"Well... Ichigo will stay here and he'll go to school like he normally would.

"Are you sure? That Diane..."

"I know her. She wouldn't attack."

* * *

Ichigo woke up, this time he didn't feel that bad. He was laying in his bed.

"Are you better?" He looked at his father. He nodded, he felt better than before even if he still felt weak. Isshin helped him get up and touched his forehead. Ichigo knew he was sweating. He closed his eyes and laid his head on his father's shoulder.

"What day and hour it is?" Ichigo asked.

"Saturday, eight. It would be strange for you to get up so early but for someone waking up after sleeping whole day: not really."Anyway, I'm glad you're feeling better."

"I slept whole day? Where is Rukia and the others?"

"How do you know they were here yesterday? You were sleeping." Isshin looked at his son.

"No, I was talking to them..." Ichigo met his father's eyes. "And then..."

"Did something happen, Ichigo?"

"Yesterday... Diane was here. I was talking to her.

"About?"

"It was nothing..." Ichigo said nervously, his hand running through his hair. "Just my head hurting and things like that... But then..." Ichigo touched his eye. "It's...?!"

"Ichigo? What happened then?"

"She said something like 'you have nice eyes' and then she looked at me and asked if she can have one. And then... "He grabbed his head. "But it's okay not, I think. Normally..."

"Maybe it was just a dream?" Isshin hugged him closer.

"Maybe... But it way too real. It hurts..." He groaned again.

"Want some painkillers?"

"No..." Ichigo sighed. "I wanna sleep. And eat something.

Isshin through it was good. If Ichigo wanted to act normally and could, it was good.

"Ichigo." Isshin remembered something. "You're going to hospital for check-up, today on twelve o'clock, okay?" He nodded. Isshin still remembered Ryūken's statement.

* * *

"Well... I believe it can be connected to his reiatsu or... With something that happened earlier, Ryūken.

"Tell me everything with every detail you remember. From the beginning."

"Well..." Isshin started. I was in my office when Ichigo came in. He was exhausted after... You know. I told him he had to rest. He wanted painkillers so I went to the kitchen and took them out. Ichigo looked even worse, I knew something was wrong. He didn't take it, he just walked out of the kitchen but... I felt, just felt something was really wrong. I looked at him when he was trying to walk straight, he walked on the door like he didn't even notice." Isshin took a deep breath and went on. "I ran to him when he almost fell and laid him down on the floor. Yuzu went for an ice and painkillers..."

"And then?"

"Ichigo was pale as the wall. I took his legs higher, laid ice... Shit, I really through it was the end." Isshin closed his eyes and laid his hand on his face. He took another deep breath and started calmer. "After a while I gave him his painkillers and laid his down on his bed."

"Painkillers on an empty stomach?"

"No, Yuzu gave him something."

"Alright it was the first one and the second?"

"In the bathroom. I took him there and after, I don't know, two or three minutes he called me. It didn't sound like he wanted something, it was more like something happened. I opened the door, he was holding sink and was looking at the mirror. I grabbed him and at the same time he let go. He didn't react, I was talking to him, tried to do something but he still didn't react. He just looked at me with half lidded eyes, them he closed his eyes.

"Something like that happened before?"

"No, Ryūken, I don't know what is happening, I... I'm really worried."

"At first: calm down. It won't help Ichigo. You can make him feel even worse. If you say to him you don't have an idea what to do, you'll stress him. Second: come at twelve tomorrow, I'll check him. Now I can't say anything more. He can't overstrain himself. If he wants, he can sleep as long as he wants, even ten hours but... If he's still exhausted tomorrow, I mean really exhausted or he feels pain or at worse he passes out... No, if in next 24 hours he passes out – you have to call an ambulance, if you don't, he'll get only worse and worse: coma or unstoppable pain..."

* * *

I was laying on the hospital bed, just a moment ago they took me in. Just one of the nurses connected me to the IV.

"Hey..." One of the three nurses said. She looked at me waiting for something. I laid my head on the pillow and felt weaker than before, I closed my eys. It was getting harder to breath and I just said weakly to one of them.

"It's hard to breath..." I opened my eyes when I heard someone's voice.

"Something's wrong?" I wanted to say but I couldn't exhale that air I was holding. Something started beeping and I closed my eyes.


End file.
